Floozy Finds: White Lady Guilt in Utah County

I like to collect patterns. I own a lot. I probably won’t get around to stitching all of them until the Zombie Apocalypse when there is nothing to do in the downtime (between zombie attacks) except needle-crafting and playing Whist.  I especially like Aunt Martha’s Hot Iron Transfers  (good for several stampings!). They are great for bastardizing. I embroidered Dame Toadstool this pillow from one of them.

Holly Hobbie and Cthulhu's Secret Love Child -- Ctholly

No, the original pattern did not include tentacle hair. (I don’t think I have ever used the word ‘tentacle’ in a sentence before. It’s usually plural, right? Now I’m all grammarly confused. What’s new.)

A few weeks ago, while perusing the Aunt Martha Hawt Iron Transfers stack, I picked up several of those weekday embroidery samplers. You know, the kind you are supposed to stitch onto your kitchen towels. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday . . . . Changing your kitchen towels regularly is as important as changing your undies, I guess. I bought four of them.

Go ahead and sew these on your knickers!

Let’s take a closer look at these.

This one isn’t too bad. The kittens don’t look very thrilled about their chores. Nothing says ‘Monday Sucks’ like hand washing your laundry in a tub.

Hey stupid kittens, you wouldn't have so many chores if you didn't wear clothes.

This one is just plain boring. Blaaah faceless women.

If you remove their sunbonnets, their heads fall off.

Okay, this next one is a little sketchy. It’s titled ‘Here Come The Indians.’

Wait a sec! Those aren't Native Americans! Those are just a bunch of Boy Scouts playing dress up at a Pow Wow!

Prepare yourselves for this last one.

WTF!

What year is this? Where am I? Why is this available in a craft store in Utah County? Please tell me. I’m so confused.

On Yadnus, we get to eat Racist Turkey!

It’s hard to believe that the ‘Mammy Archetype‘ is still being perpetuated in a little craft store in Provo, USA, yet here she is complete with head kerchief and apron. Sure, we are mostly white here in Utah County and basically oblivious, but still! I find this to be rather outrageous.

I ironed this pattern on fabric only to be 'iron'ic, I swear!

Don’t worry. I’m not going to stitch it. Unless I think of something awesomely artistic and evocative to do with it. Which I probably won’t, because my White Lady Guilt won’t let me.

UPDATE: I gave the infamous pattern a makeover. Check it out over at The Cotton Floozy blog.