Floozy Finds: Utah County Ladies!

Posted on November 10, 2011 by TheCottonFloozy

Before I get rolling, let me preface by saying that I love you, Utah County ladies. You are hot. I honestly don’t care that you wear sparkly butt jeans and have fake boobs. Own it. I have known many a blonde, buxom woman here who could take me down if we were suddenly in a heated high school debate competition about the labor standards of overseas manufacturing. Your upgraded rack would definitely not stop you from brilliantly obliterating  my arguments  (of which my best would be ‘Errrr, drrrrr, sweatshops bad! Grape gum delicious!’) until I was reduced to a bubbling, incomprehensible puddle that the janitor would later throw sawdust over and scrape up with a trowel.

My last Floozy Finds was about this offensive! pattern I found at a local craft store.

I know.

Don’t worry! I fixed it. I gave her a Utah County Makeover.

This Utah County Lady Loves Tuesday!

Let me introduce you to the classic features of your typical Utah County Lady. (Stereotypes bad! Grape gum delicious!) Continue reading →

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What are we DOING?!?! Redwall cheese and a crochet sock.

Posted on November 9, 2011 by Volatile Volscian

what are we DOING?

Today I was running around like a maniac, trying to fill out paperwork, going to therapy, buying milk, going to the post office, test driving a car. I forgot until 1/2 hour before bedtime that it was my day to post! Fortunately I don’t have much to write today, so I should be able to go to bed as scheduled.

I haven’t been making anything recently because I’m more interested in finding a new car. I only have 2 things going on:

My sister has asked me to create a Redwall feast for her birthday party on Sunday. In preparation of that, today I made some Redwall cheese. I don’t know which book it’s from because I didn’t take notes quite that helpful, but it’s in there somewhere. It’s white cheese with sage. Almost all Redwall cheese has something mixed into it, which is why I had to make my own! I even used sage from my garden. The recipe is here. I didn’t get a photo of the finished cheese because I was cold and lazy.

The other thing is that my friend, Derpenna, taught me how to crochet a while ago. She taught me the single crochet stitch. My first project, like all first crochet projects, was a deformed rectangle of cloth. I decided on a stitch that I like the look of, which is apparently called a slip stitch, and went on to a very ambitious 2nd project: crocheting socks. I’m doing them in the same way I’ve done my naalbinding socks, but with crochet instead, which I’ve found I prefer because it’s a bit faster, and I can actually undo mistakes.  Here they are so far:

y u so fat

They’re not going to match, and I’m okay with that.

So what are you guys up to?

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Doughnuts for Doughboys! A Pumpkin Doughnut Recipe.

Posted on November 8, 2011 by Dame Toadstool

Vintage Happy Valley banner

It brings me great pleasure to share with you this vintage pumpkin doughnut recipe from the archives of the Springville Herald, sponsored by Spry (a mid-20th century vegetable shortening competitor of Crisco). Mmmm…. heart clogging deliciousness!

Apparently there was a war somewhere in 1942 that affected people living in Utah. And the soldiers a.k.a. “doughboys” on break needed to be coddled with fried things, and of course you were planning a party for them. I imagine that the war had something to do with protecting our right to make and consume copious quantities of fried things.

Vintage doughnut recipe with SPRY: Doughnuts for Doughboys

Fry in hot Spry about 1.5 inches deep. OMG. Arteries clogging just thinking about it.  But hey! It’s so digestible that even your children will eat the doughnuts! If you make pumpkin doughnuts using this recipe, please leave a comment here and let us know how they turned out. And if your doughboys really did love them as promised.

Here’s the text from the clipping in case you’re having a hard time reading the article or the pumpkin doughnut recipe: Continue reading →

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Floozy Finds: White Lady Guilt in Utah County

Posted on November 7, 2011 by TheCottonFloozy

Floozy Finds - The Cotton Floozy reveals Utah County craft culture

I like to collect patterns. I own a lot. I probably won’t get around to stitching all of them until the Zombie Apocalypse when there is nothing to do in the downtime (between zombie attacks) except needle-crafting and playing Whist.  I especially like Aunt Martha’s Hot Iron Transfers  (good for several stampings!). They are great for bastardizing. I embroidered Dame Toadstool this pillow from one of them.

Holly Hobbie and Cthulhu's Secret Love Child -- Ctholly

No, the original pattern did not include tentacle hair. (I don’t think I have ever used the word ‘tentacle’ in a sentence before. It’s usually plural, right? Now I’m all grammarly confused. What’s new.)

A few weeks ago, while perusing the Aunt Martha Hawt Iron Transfers stack, I picked up several of those weekday embroidery samplers. You know, the kind you are supposed to stitch onto your kitchen towels. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday . . . . Changing your kitchen towels regularly is as important as changing your undies, I guess. I bought four of them.

Go ahead and sew these on your knickers!

Let’s take a closer look at these. Continue reading →

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What Are We DOING? Did you just say doing?

Posted on November 2, 2011 by Volatile Volscian

what are we DOING?

I’m thinking of killing my Etsy shop in a slow, painful death as I slowly, painfully get rid of my inventory (it could take years!). I haven’t sewn in a long time and I’m just losing interest in making garb with the hopes that someone, somewhere will buy it. I think I just want to make garb for friends and family from now on, so they can be there to provide measurements and try on mockups and all that. The weaving sells pretty well, so if I ever get rid of all the garb and jewelry, I’ll change my shop name and just sell weaving.

So here’s what I’m making:

Current tablet weaving project. I’m nearly done with it. The speckly light green yarn is 100% wool, the dark green yarn is mostly lambswool with some cashmere. Luxurious! I hope someone appreciates it enough to buy it.

For the yard work, I shoveled a lot of that gravel to transport it from the driveway to the back yard. The pain! I have no idea what the gravel is for.

 

And today I cleaned my room (yay!). It’s not REALLY clean, but it’s the best I could do. While cleaning off the hoarder pile of papers on my desk, I found a bunch of notes for my script and ended up writing a bunch of scenes. Yay! I’m getting there!


One more thing. Our garden was freezing, so we picked all the tomatoes to let the plants die. The vast majority of these tomatoes are green. I’ve been making and snarfing down salsa verde like crazy. I make a new batch every day. Here’s the recipe:

 

 


1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. black pepper
3 cups diced green tomatoes
1/2 cup parsley
1/4 cup diced onion (1 small onion)
1/4 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tsp. oregano
2 tsp. thyme
2 tsp. sugar
4 garlic cloves, minced (2 tsp.)
1/2 tsp. – 1 tsp. red pepper flakes (optional)

Blend all ingredients together until liquefied. Makes 1 quart.

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